No easy ride

Let’s face it, parenting multiples never gets any easier. There are constant challenges as they grow and develop.

My wife found the baby phase relatively easy and enjoyable. She was breastfeeding, and although absolutely exhausted, she was in her element of new motherhood; not phased by the stress we were under. Whereas I, on the other hand, struggled, especially in the first six months. I was overwhelmed at times with sheer exhaustion from home life and a full-time physical job as a welder. I was a first-time Dad and drowning in the deep end.

But it wasn’t without sublime moments of absolute love and bliss. I eventually found my groove, and we became a solid team. I  was hands-on from day one and did everything I could to support my family through a traumatic time of adjustment and stress.

But it soon became apparent that being parents of triplets took every ounce of focus and time. There was no more free time in our marriage. We lived in a bubble of structure and routine. We worked together, and any free time was split by giving each other time out alone – just to get a break. It was tough going, and it took commitment and dedication to the cause.

It took time and work to reconnect as a couple again. To be in a marriage and not just being co-workers for a bunch of demanding, fighting, tyrannical toddlers. But through discipline, patience, and love, they have grown, for the most part, into good girls. They are kind (sometimes), caring (occasionally), and fun to be around.

My wife and I tend to take it in turns to hit walls as life goes on as parents. My wife is finding this stage more challenging, whereas I’m enjoying it more. They’re not always naughty at the moment, but they are relentless in their energy, their questions, and their wanting horsey rides and attention. They take a great amount of patience. I love their conversations, stories, and tales.

My wife and I bring different strengths to the table with each new stage. My patience is helping at the moment, and my wife’s organisational skills are nothing short of miraculous. We are working with a small house. It takes planning to adapt it as the girls get bigger. I would struggle to imagine what she does to make it work.

I often wondered during the tough times when it would get easier. I’ve since given up that fantasising. Because I live in the reality of our situation. And in the stress and pressure I have realised that there are going to be no breaks. No days off. I have been given the path of fatherhood, and in that responsibility, I have been set on a path of sacrifice, personal development, and growth. It’s my job to strengthen from stress. To improve as a man with the greatest job a man could ever have. And my attitude means everything.