Age 19 I was hospitalised with psychosis. I had suffered badly with deppresion and anxiety leading up to that psychotic break. It was a frightening time in my life, mainly because of the reality that I may not recover. I believed I would always be affected by poor mental health.
Alcohol abuse didn’t help my situation. I had been abusing alcohol from the age of 14, around 17 I got into drinking whisky and my drinking really took off – as did my troubles.
All the tension and fear I lived with was taking it’s toll. The voices snd hallucinations almost became a personal comfort as I struggled to cope with my emotions and life. There was no escaping them. Medications just made me worse and dragged me down further. I was convinced there was a another dimension to my suffering and I was right. It would be another decade before I made that stark discovery.
A decade later was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. My solution of alcohol was no longer keeping me stable. And without booze in a detox my mental health condition was magnified. I had sensed a darkness within me for a long time. It was a darkness I kept suppressed with alcohol – but alcohol was no longer working.
It was when I searched for a spiritual solution for alcoholism that the truth was revealed to me. There was a spiritual problem at the core of my suffering. I had sensed it from a child. From all the anger I harbored. It was the universal dark energy of resentment that was destroying me. And all the labels of mental health disorders could be traced back to it. There was no such thing as a chemical imbalance, only a spiritual infection. Medication would never work.
The more I struggled to escape it the tighter it’s grip. All my mental health problems were a manifestation of spiritual dis-ease. My real problem was spiritual in nature – not mental. Those diagnosis I had throughout my life were mere symptoms of suppressed resentment. And as long as anger remained in me I would have gone on suffering til the bitter end. Dying an alcoholic death. I had to be freed from what had infected me. I had to be freed from anger.
There is a meditation technique, thousands of years old that can resolve this spiritual conflict. I happened upon it by chance after getting sober. I was still plagued by anger and resentment but without alcohol and drugs to suppress those negative emotions. The man I met told me to meditate daily. That was it, I was told I needn’t do anything else. I couldn’t see at all how this was going to help me,
I was open to meditation, but the idea it was going to resolve my anger and mental health problems seemed ridiculous. I mean, after years of therapy and medications somehow by sitting still twice a day for 10 minutes I was going to get well and know freedom? I called bs on it. But it held my interest and I had nothing to lose by giving it a shot.
So I did. And ALL my mental health problems resolved as I was freed from anger and given a way to master resentment and build resilience to stress. And it happened quickly. Within the space of the first week of meditating.
If mental health problems are affecting you, and you are willing to approach them from a whole different angle. Give this a try and have your own experience. Make your own mind up on spiritual matters. But trust me – you won’t regret this.
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