As was pointed out to me recently my life is not normal. In many ways it never has been.
From the self created tornado I got thrown out of 6 years ago before meeting Stacey, we have had little time to stop to breath. A year after getting married a triplet pregnancy brought me into another tornado, one that gave me more purpose than I have ever felt.
If you follow this little corner of the web, you will have followed our journey as a family. And it’s been an intense ride.
From having to adjust to a doubling of my family unit overnight – to having to step up to the emotional pressures I faced as a first time biological dad, I’ve had to stay on the ball to overcome the fears and concerns that arised in our situation. Having missed Frankie’s early years, being baptised into the fire of newborns with triplets has been no joke.
This time a year ago on new years eve I was taken into to hospital for an MRI scan, unable to walk and overwhelmed with widespread nerve pain. So as well as dealing with home-life over the year I’ve been faced with the discovery of a permanent pain condition and now testing for traumatic brain injury. But today I feel good, rested and positive about the road ahead.
Works changed, my personal life has been physically and mentally limited but they are new adjustments that I will overcome and adapt to.
As for my daughters, Frankie is now at high school, loving the experience and doing well in her classes, exceptionally in some. She has found her place as big sister to her three bossy little sisters, she has a patience with them. A principle I strived to bring to my family that is continually paying off.
My wife has become the ultimate mom. I am in awe at her natural ability to manage our daughters needs. She has a flawless intuition to deal with them in a loving no-nonsense way. Her strength and ability to find humor in any situation has been a rock for us this year as I’ve struggled at times with accepting my condition.
I also managed to complete and publish my book in the summer. A labour of love which documents my journey into insanity as a result of my own dysfunctional upbringing and lack of a father’s support. From overcoming the damage of my past to becoming a loving parent and how I dealt with the pregnancy and first six months of the arrival of triplets. I wanted to give an example of the difference a father can make to his family when love and tolerance become central principles to his home.
The title has recently changed so as not to be confused with it being a self help book. ‘From triples to triplets: The making of a triplet dad’ is now available on Amazon.
Now as the year closes to and end I still feel a sense of achievement, one that comes from faith, and stepping back to see my family thriving and growing in confidence despite the challenges we have hit along the road.
I have no doubt the road ahead will continue to bring its struggles and highs and lows, but as dad it all comes back to one thing for me. To stay strong and to do my best to raise my family with the love and light that has brought us this far.
I wish you all the best for the new year. And that it brings you all you need – and a little bit of what you want.